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The Stone Turntable Movie Podcast

Movie-related podcast that include reviews, social commentary and analysis from several points of view. Subject matter will range from early cinema history to current releases and related news material(s). Intended audiences are 18+ and older and may or may not include adult language and subject material. Views expressed are personal and belong to podcast-personality's and may or may not reflect that of Light's Chosen Media.
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The Stone Turntable Movie Podcast
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Mar 9, 2017

Welcome to The Stone Turntable!!!

This time around the table our daring hosts jump into the show headfirst with little preparation.

This week's episode covers some Steven Segal movies from the 1990's, speculations about Logan and the upcoming Infinity War film, consumer sentiments regarding cinema and gaming and then a lengthy discussion of Star Wars ensued (who knew?!).

Our hosts dredge up a little known movie called Dark Harbor (1998) starring Alan Rickman and Norman Reedus which left one of our hosts dubiously skeptical after watching just a few minutes of it.

We are ramping things up next week with our first annual Saint Patrick's Day podcast!

Call a designated driver and remove the Explicit Language filter.

NO ducks will join us next week.

NSFW/Explicit Rating applies.

Have a safe week and keep smiling.

Mar 1, 2017

Welcome to The Stone Turntable!!!!

This week our hosts return to recap the winners of the 89th Annual Oscars which happened on Sunday. Our hosts cover the following main categories:

  • Best Actor in Leading Role: Casey Affleck, Manchester by the Sea (a win for Amazom Studios)
  • Best Actress in Leading Role: Emma Stone, La La Land
  • Best Supporting Actor: Mahershala Ali, Moonlight
  • Best Supporting Actress: Viola Davis, Fences
  • Best Director: Damien Chazelle, La La Land
  • Best Animated Film: Zootopia, Disney
  • Best Original Score: Justin Hurwitz, La La Land
  • Best Original Song: City of Stars, La La Land
  • Best Picture: Moonlight
  • Writing (Best Original Screenplay): Kenneth Lonergan, Manchester by the Sea. Go to oscars.org for the complete list with all nominees!

Tribute to Bill Paxton

Actor Bill Paxton passed away this weekend due to complications following heart surgery at the age of 61 years old. A Texas native, Paxton had many supporting roles in films including Aliens, Terminator, Predator 2, Commando, Weird Science, Tombstone, Apollo 13, Titanic and starred in the movie Twister with Helen Hunt. His body of work included directing, founding member of the band Martini Ranch, music videos, voice over work in a video game and a lot of television work over his career. He was nominated for an Emmy for his work on Hatfield and McCoys.  He is largely remembered by coworkers throughout his career as a generous, kind human being and a pleasure to work with. See Twitter for many reactions from those who worked with him; Tom Hanks and Paxton became close friends during the filming of Apollo 13 and posted a brief message about Paxton.  (from imdb.com, Wikipedia.com, yahoo.com and ABC News).

Our sincerest condolences to friends, family and coworkers impacted the greatest by his passing.

 

Visit us on Twitter @stone_turntable and drop a note! We can be found on iTunes, GooglePlay, TuneIn and Stitcher. Tell your friends. Give us five minutes.

"You'll quack up!"

mallard duck

NSFW/Explicit Rating ensues.

*no ducks were harmed during the taping of this episode*

Feb 23, 2017

Welcome to Movie Roulette!!!

This week our hosts strap on our body armor and take pot-shots at one another and discuss three movies during this installment. Our hosts discuss Cocoon 2 (1988) with Jessica Tandy, Nothing to Lose (1997) with Tim Robbins and Zardoz (1974) starring Sean Connery.

One of our hosts willfully criticizes the "body of work" of Nicholas Cage in a salty rant about being a responsible adult, talk of a new upcoming segment and an exploration of drug-influenced movies in cinema during the 1970's were tabled during this episode.

Joe laments that the IMDB message boards are no longer going to continue, Juan didn't fully recap Nothing to Lose and wings it poorly. Sean almost got lost in the morass that was quite possibly one of the worst movies in Sean Connery's career. "ZARDOZ!!!"

Our hosts also discuss the history of the famous "Wilhelm Scream" (near 18:00 mark). https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wilhelm_scream

 

NSFW/Explicit Rating!!!! Ya been warned. Many times.

 

*Corrections:

Howard the Duck was directed by Willard Huyck.

Sean Connery played James Bond from 1962-1967, 1971, 1983.

 

No ducks were harmed during the taping of this episode.

Feb 14, 2017

NSFW-Explicit Rating.

Welcome to The Stone Turntable!

Love is in the air as our salty hosts stomp on the flowers, eat all the chocolates and host another round of Marry, Quack, Kill as well as talked about their opinions about Kubo and the Two Strings. At the request of a new listener, Joe spoke briefly about Split and gave M.Night Shamalan some good marks.

We talk briefly about today's holiday and wish you and those you love a safe Valentine's Day.

Spread the Love.

Reap the blessings of mirth.

Don't be a shithead.


We gave a shout out to a friend of the show, Dana, who recently published a full length studio album called Desert Mermaid, now on iTunes!! Click link below:

https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/desert-mermaid/id1205215051

 Do it!!!

 

*we managed to coax a few ducks to show up in the studio with some candy. None got diabetes during the taping of this show.

Feb 2, 2017

Welcome to The Stone Turntable!!!

This week, "the proof is in the pudding!!"

Our hosts return to follow up on 2016's Oscar nominations which were announced on January 24, 2017. See the full list at www.oscars.org/.

They also bring you a new segment called "Marry, Quack, Kill?" where our hosts force each other to rank a group of three movies by whether or not they would "marry" them, "quack" them or "kill" them off.

The shenanigans are in full swing this time around and full Explicit language/NSFW in effect. Many ducks returned from their respite to pitch in on the editing process but jet lag seemed to affect their efficiency. None were harmed during the taping of this episode.

Subscribe to our show at www.thestoneturntable.libsyn.com or go find us on Twitter @stone_turntable!

We are on iTunes, GooglePlay, Stitcher and TuneIn.

Jan 23, 2017

Welcome to 2017!

We at The Stone Turntable have been preparing since the beginning of the year to bring you a sneek-peek at what movies are scheduled for release in 2017 as well as talk about the upcoming Oscars.

Our hosts wander all over the map regarding the Oscars, who might win Best Picture, upcoming films that range from the fantastic to the questionable -cough Xformers- and offer their opinions regarding the latter.

2016 was a chaotic year and 2017 seems to be jumping off in similar fashion for a multitude of reasons. Whatever your storm is now, we at The Stone Turntable wish you well going into this new movie year and hope that Hollywood satisfies your cinematic craving as much as we do!

Check us out on iTunes, GooglePlay, Stitcher and TuneIn as well as on Twitter @stone_turntable. You can subscribe to our feed directly from our website at www.thestoneturntable.libsyn.com as well!

Warning: Explicit language. NSFW rules apply. Show is for a mature/adult audience. You been done told. ;)

 

*some ducks went on strike this episode; any missed F-bombs were due to understaffing while negotiations continue. Our apologies.*

Dec 31, 2016

Welcome to The Stone Turntable! (NSFW/Explicit)

This time around our hosts "just can't even" as they try to put the last calendar year into brief perspective. They discuss best and worst in movies for 2016 as well as pay humble respects to a handful of many, many celebrities, movie stars who passed away this year. ):

One of our hosts was on post-holiday sick leave and we all wish him a speedy recovery as we go into the New Year.

We at The Stone Turntable thank you for your support and for giving us a few minutes to share our movie experiences with you. You have helped make the last two years a LOT of fun and we look forward to many more!!

May good health be upon you,

may you be wrapped in loving arms,

may laughter and Joy

follow you this year.

Be awesome.

 

May the Force be with You Always Kenny, Carrie and Debbie. <3 <3

 

*our ducks were on vacation for the holiday season--fringe benefits to having a seasonal migratory clause*

Dec 23, 2016

Welcome to The Stone Turntable's Movie Roulette!

This time around our hosts recap movies given to them by another cohost. Our hosts discuss three movies: Anomolisa (2015), Chef (2014) and Batteries Not Included (1987).

Mention of the RBG food porn page on Facebook was made related to the Chef movie review! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1506759709624136/?ref=bookmarks So many people share THEIR love for cooking there we wanted to spread the word.

The fire stays stoked as our hosts play devil's advocate and share their ideas about perception (SNAAAAAKE), the love of cooking, weird conditions, flying Pepsi cans and ultimately, Arrival and Rogue One.

Joe saw Arrival and shares his reactions, take-aways and general feeling of awe while Juan went and saw Rogue One at an IMAX 3D theater and had to contain his younger self. He talks briefly about James Luceno's Catalyst prequel novel, basic summarization and why it is a likeable film. (Every attempt at avoiding a spoiler was made. BE WARNED)

Our post production crew had to go borrow more ducks to implement an acceptable level of "quacks"; each duck was dressed as an elf and fed candy canes to stay placated and productive.

*No ducks were harmed while working in Santa's Shop*

 

Nov 29, 2016

Welcome to The Stone Turntable!!!

This time around our hosts explore three (of many) Overrated Movies that each of them selected to explore. One of our hosts has a flashback, another reconciles bad movies about mortals and the last host lays his pecker on the chopping block by presenting a questionable choice. o.O

Join our hosts as they discuss their choices and why they made their picks. Some choices may or may not be aligned with what you think. We have a Twitter poll going on our page @stone_turntable. Listen to the podcast and choose which movie you think (of the three talked about) is the most overrated. Movies 1-3 are in chronological order as they were discussed.We will disclose poll results in our next episode!

Thank you for joining us.

We are on iTunes, GooglePlay, Stitcher and TuneIn!! Go to Browse/Explore and type in The Stone Turntable then SUBSCRIBE!!!

 

*no ducks were verbally, psychologically or physically mistreated during this making of this episode. The post production crew, however, were worked like dogs.*

Explicit Language Warning!! NSFW

Opinions expressed are for entertainment purposes and do not necessarily reflect that of hosts or affiliates. All rights reserved to respective parties.

Nov 24, 2016

Welcome to The Stone Turntable!!

Join our host on a very short podcast journey as he offers gratitude on this day of reflection and community.

Wherever you are, we at The Stone Turntable wish you and your loved ones a very happy holiday filled with mirth, time spent with loved ones and most of all....FOOOOOOD!!!

All I know is the tacos around my house are going to be off the chain the next couple weeks!! ;D

Many thanks to Libsyn.com for providing this platform for us to be knuckleheads and share our observations of the ever changing (or not?) world of movies and entertainment.

Thanks and love to our audience who help motivate us to continue to explore this media and be better podcasters. <3

You can subscribe at our website: www.thestoneturntable.libsyn.com

OR

You can find us on Twitter @stone_turntable, on iTunes, GooglePlay, Stitcher and TuneIn!!!

*not one single duck was found roaming the studio today. ;D*

Nov 17, 2016

Welcome to The Stone Turntable!!!!

This week our hosts have another Free 4 All and cover a wide variety of films including the following:

Brief political mouth-puke, Good Old Games (GOG.com), VR tech, Smurfs, Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (in Theaters November 18), Dr. Strange (in theaters now), Hacksaw Ridge (in theaters now), Assassin’s Creed, Rogue One (Dec. 16), A Dog’s Purpose (Jan 27), Lego Batman Movie , Logan (March 3), Strange Magic and Ghost in the Shell (March 31).

We pull off our white straight-jackets, open up our minds and deliver another extemporaneous show based on upcoming movies going into the new year.

We tend to used imdb.com for some of our sourcing as well as late night searches of the wide world of the Internet. Take a look around at your various sources—we might be there looking too!

Look for us on iTunes, GooglePlay, TuneIn, Stitcher and Twitter @stone_turntable.

Take a peek at our Twitter page for upcoming and current polls (for fun) about movies, past and present as well as pop culture. Drop us a note or “follow”—we will do the same!!

Explicit Warning: Ducks are sneaky and can sometimes evade humans despite their skill at corralling the explicit language. Be forewarned.

Nov 4, 2016

Welcome to The Stone Turntable!

Join our Hosts as they deliver impromptu, off-the-cuff and extemporaneous ideas and opinions about a handful of different movies and topics. They briefly discuss a wide range of movies including Rogue One, Ghostbusters, Allied, Nocturnal Animals, Bug, Resident Evil (2017), Doctor Strange and many others.

Our hosts also dish out briefly on story continuity, movie and video game trends and one of our hosts goes off about his love for Starbucks, Warcraft, KOTOR and SWTOR.

They also discuss a real-life "Herbert the Pervert" from the Family Show; one of our hosts came across this news reel from The Woody Show on Alt 98.7 via iHeart Radio app. Here's the link: http://alt987fm.iheart.com/onair/the-woody-show-54307/herbert-from-family-guy-in-real-14957551/

We are on Twitter @stone_turntable, iTunes, GooglePlay, Stitcher and TuneIn! Subscribe and drop us a note!

 

Please remember: as often as our post production team "quacks" the F-bombs, some ducks are tricky and can slip through. EXPLICIT LANGUAGE and SPOILER ALERTS!

Hosts and provider are not affiliated with any entities mentioned or accredited; all rights reserved to respective parties.

Oct 29, 2016

Welcome to The <Haunted> Stone Turntable!!!

Join our harrowing hosts as we take a walk on the darker path in the movie world and talk about nearly a dozen movies related to (and sometimes not) Halloween. Movies include: The Rocky Horror Picture Show, High Spirits, Halloween (with Jaime Lee Curtis), Kramus, Trick R Treat, Rob Zombie films, Lords of Salem, Charlie Brown and the Great Pumpkin and The Book of Life. We even talk about the recent Power Rangers movie (just because) and walk the streets of movie cinema looking for good treats.

Hollywood hardly fails to deliver in this highly commercialized, historically based and cosplay styled holiday.  There are plenty other films, TV shows and other pop culture elements that we don't cover--so explore what's out there!! From old Disney cartoons to Jack Skellington, Hocus Pocus to Sleepy Hollow, the darker, archaic and often more evil realities in life are brought front and center to be confronted.

Get ready to press <cos>play, sharpen your fangs, hit subscribe at iTunes, Google Play, Stitcher or TuneIn to join us! You can follow us on Twitter too: @stone_turntable.

Special shout out to our friend "L" for the new graphic art. You are awesome!!

*all ducks were unharmed during the taping of this episode and were gratuitously compensated in the form of candy*

Oct 19, 2016

Welcome back to The Stone Turntable!!

In this episode, our hosts cover a Disney film that looks visually stunning, explore movies about courage and combat and revisit a witch project. We covered the new Blair Witch Project movie which hit the theaters on September 16, 2016 (a day after this recording). They also watched Hacksaw Ridge which will hit movie theaters on November 4, 2016 and then finished the 'cast with Disney's Moana, set to hit movie theaters November 23, 2016 (imdb.com).

We invited some younger guests to join us in watching the trailer for Moana to get their initial reactions too!

You can find us on iTunes, Google Play and Stitcher as well as our website where you can SUBSCRIBE!: thestoneturntable.libsyn.com!

The crew is playing catch up after our post production guy went out for extensive surgery in late September. We are working diligently to get back on track and keep you posted about what's going on in the movie world!!!

Oh yeah. We swear a lot (except when young hosts are around), so NSFW. I quacked as much as I could. Jus' sayin.

*ducks were fed humanely with soy crackers, and were often let out to graze free range style at regular intervals.*

Sep 5, 2016

Azeroth is being assailed again.

Fel fire fills the skies.
Gul'dan runs amok anew, and its up to us, Azeroth's Greatest Champions, to scour the Broken Isles, hone our skills, acquire Legendary Weapons and beat the shit out of another Orc troublemaker.

In this episode, one of our hosts takes up arms and shares approximately one hours worth of gameplay as he restraps his armor, hits the repair vendor and strikes out to explore Blizzard's latest title release for its World of Warcraft franchise.

Our host "Shal" decided to add another channel to our small network of podcasts to share insights on the evolving and changing landscape of the Gaming World and resubscribed for a month to explore Legion (despite misgivings). We had to wait for the "Pally Bubble" to wear off to chain him down and log in.

Legion is now live and Blizzard has announced a new patch coming up that will focus on Karazhan (7.1 I think). The recent Hearthstone patch kind of nodded toward an upcoming revamp of another of Burning Crusade era content that resonated well with players at time of release and thereafter. Our host Shal recently solo'd Karazhan again and noted the larger number of players in the vicinity. Karazhan revolves around the Last Guardian of Azeroth, Medivh, and the events that took place surrounding his last apprentice, Khadgar, who is a main protagonist in both the Warlords of Draenor and Legion release(s).

Grab your mount, stock up on Kungaloosh and hit the repair vendor:

The Stone Turntable pulls Boss in 5, 4.....

 By the way: SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER Alert!!!!

For information about Warcraft:Legion and other Warcraft related titles, click on this link: http://us.battle.net/en/int?r=wow

Aug 21, 2016

Check your magazine and mascara---your hosts return to review Suicide Squad, which is still in theaters!! Starring Jared Leto (Joker), Margot Robbie (Harley Quinn), Will Smith (Deadshot) and a host of others, Suicide Squad hit the theaters on August 4, 2016 (early release) and has earned $241 Million in the US to date (imdb.com).

Join us as our hosts adjust their attitudes and explore the idea that being bad could be sooooo good!

Directed by David Ayer. Written by David Ayer, Bill Finger, John Ostrander and Ross Andru.

 

Explicit language/themes and crude humor. NSFW.

"I warned ya".

 

*no ducks were harmed during the production of this podcast*

 

Aug 15, 2016

The boys get back to the studio after seeing the early release of Suicide Squad (Warner Bros) on August 4, 2015. Real life functions like moving, family and work and an injury have kept our hosts away from the microphones (to our chagrin). We look forward to sharing our thoughts about this hyped up film that seems to continue to do well in the theaters world wide.

Join Us. We are only a little bit bad (and we also have cookies).

Apr 30, 2016

Welcome to The Stone Turntable!

This time around the boys get back to the studio after a bit of a break and catch up on things happening in the movie world. Joe, Sean and Juan rant, rave and break out the salt lick for one of our spiciest and NSFW episodes yet. We let the Dark Side flow and pulled no punches. The "F-Bombs" were dropped in full salvo this episode so be forewarned: you will hear crass yet insightful observations of Deadpool, the Rogue One theatrical trailer, Joe's feedback about Point Break (Point FAIL) and Suicide Squad.

Secure your earmuffs, pull up a chair and grab that fresh "Juan Special" from Starbucks.

Join us at The Stone Turntable.

 

 

Light's Chosen Media, 2016. All rights reserved.

Dec 19, 2015

Galactic Greetings and Salutations!

Welcome to The Stone Turntable.

This week "Juan Solo" sits in the studio and dishes on going to Star Wars tonight as Joe is off at the Imperial Academy on Carida and Sean is out on a Kessel Run.

Star Wars:The Force Awakens was directed by J.J. Abrams, written by Abrams, Lawrence Kasdan (et al). It stars Mark Hamill, Carrie Fisher, Harrison Ford, Peter Mayhew, John Boyega, Anthony Daniels, Daisy Ridley and more, it runs just over 2 hours long. SW was conceived by George Lucas. /highfive

Events of this film are set decades after the events of Return of the Jedi and introduces audiences to new characters such as Finn and Rey as well as new villains in Kylo Ren.

/waveshand "You WILL go see Star Wars: The Force Awakens..." ;D

I got my tickets at Fandango.com and am seeing it in 3D at The Edwards Theater in Bakersfield CA.

 

*No jawas were harmed during the taping of this installment.

Sep 7, 2015

Welcome to The Stone Turntable!!

In this episode, our Hosts turned to one of the ladies in our lives for inspiration and was recommended a movie to watch. We cover Nightcrawler (2014) starring Jake Gyllenhal, Life of Brian (1979) starring John Cleese and the Suicide Room (2011) directed by Jan Komasa.

Wipe the lipstick from your cheek and tell your ladies you love em, because we are going to take a walk through the dark underworld of investigative reporting, the perils of online chatrooms and end on a humorous interpretation of Biblical proportions.

The Stone Turntable starts now (as soon as you click "play").

 

 

Warning: Explicit language and sexual themes (blame The Suicide Room).

*No ducks were harmed during post production of this episode*

Light's Chosen Media, 2015.

Aug 17, 2015

Welcome to The Stone Turntable!!

This week we pulled an episode out of the Archives to share with you the anthological masterpiece that is Four Rooms, written by Quentin Tarantino, Alexander Rockwell, Robert Rodriguez and Allison Anders.

Each writer wrote the script for each individual room and wove this masterpiece together like skilled quilters, telling the story of Ted the Bellhop whose unbelievable journey through the Mon Signor tale is reminiscient of a modern Odyssey.

Directed by Tarantino and Rodriguez, starring Tim Roth (Ted), Tarantino (Chester), Bruce Willis (Leo), Antonio Banderas, Jennifer Beals and a host of other familiar actors, Four Rooms was released in 1995 and still has the relevance expected from Tarantino's best features.

Grab your luggage, turn down Auld Lang Syne. Put a doctor on standby and prepare to ride on Ted's coat tails as he rides the waves of New Years Eve at Hotel Mon Signor.

This is The Stone Turntable.

 *Explicit Rating: Coarse language/mature content

Four Rooms can be found on Netflix, Amazon Video and iTunes. Soundtrack by Esquivel is also available at iTunes and Amazon Music.

 

Aug 1, 2015

Welcome back to The Stone Turntable!

This week our hosts played Movie Roulette, a little game where each host assigns another host a random movie to review.

This week we cover A Fish Called Wanda, Black Dynamite and The Last Unicorn.

Join us as we spin the barrel and wade through the fish tank with John Cleese and Jamie Lee Curtis, laugh our three piece suits to ribbons with Michael Jai White and whimsically skip through a fantasy land soundtracked by the band America.

This is The Stone Turntable.

 

 

*Editor's Note: Explicit language warning is in effect as a fella can only "Quack" so much before it sounds like an Internet cafe where everyone is playing Duck Hunt.

Jun 14, 2015

Welcome to The Stone Turntable!!!!

This week we return to review Jurassic World, which was released to theaters everywhere on Friday, June 12 2015. This summer blockbuster returns audiences to Isla Nublar, where a full theme park version now operates nearly 22 years after Hammond's Jurassic Park.

This film features the acting talents of Bryce Dallas Howard, Vincent D'Onofrio, Chris Pratt, Jake Johnson and B.D. Wong (to name a few), was directed by Colin Trevorrow and released by Amblin Entertainment/Legendary Pictures. Film's estimated budget: $150million.

As of today's date (6/14), IMDB reports a Gross Sales figure of over $240million (US). The following link is to a Yahoo! article published 6/14: https://www.yahoo.com/movies/s/jurassic-world-bites-off-record-204-6-million-160908116--finance.html

Local Residents: The Hitching Post Theatre is currently showing this film and tickets are available online via their website: http://www.hitchingposttheaters.com/

Join us as we take the digital tram around a theme park-world that takes us into the distant past.....

Tie off your brachiosaurus balloons, strap on your safety helmets and anti-Dilophosaurus goggles......The Stone Turntable starts now.

 

 

Corrections: Lex Murphy from Jurassic Park (1993) is portrayed by Ariana Richards, not Ariana Richardson.

Light's Chosen Media, 2015.

May 11, 2015

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!

As we all spent the day celebrating mothers, grandmothers, sisters, wives and all the mothers in our lives, we at The Stone Turntable just wanted to slow things down and show our appreciation for our mothers.

You are all loved beyond description, and have helped shape the people we are today.

 

This is for you, Mom.

 

 

Lights Chosen Media, 2015. All Rights Reserved.

May 6, 2015

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away....

A movie was made that completely changed the world, the way we look at and set out to make movies. The Star Wars franchise has had a nearly immeasurable influence on so many facets of the entertainment industry it is mind boggling. Dare I suggest it, but its resonant impact is akin to that of the automobile. Star Wars and its characters are as recognizable as family members, friends and foe alike. There are few (if any?) that are unaware of its ubiquitous charm.

This week our hosts set their navicomputer coordinates through a maze of conversation relating to "all things Star Wars".

Join us as we cover mostly Episodes 1-6, briefly discuss comic book and novelizations as well as The Old Republic mmorpg.

Equip your mainhand and make sure you repaired your armor--The Stone Turntable starts now.

 

May the Force Be With You.

 

Light's Chosen Media, 2015.

 

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